“Every time I thought I was being rejected from something good, I was being re-directed to something even better” ~ Dr. Steve Maraboli
Anthropologists claim that the fear of rejection has deep-seated evolutionary reasons in all of us i.e. expulsion from social tribes etc. However, it has no logical basis in today’s cosmopolitan world we live in; yet most of us have had to deal with the fear of rejection that often stops us from asking for what we want and deserve. This has a considerable impact on our professional and personal lives.
Below are a few solid action tips that can help alter your neural pathways for the better and transcend the fear of rejection. It has helped me a lot, and it can work for you as well:
1. Set your own rules for rejection which depends on your own behavior and not the external circumstances: Create a rule for instance: “I am rejected only when I try to take advantage of people by engaging in a WIN-LOSE deal” Since you don’t engage in such unfair practices the chances of being rejected are never.
2. Re-frame the outcome: You don’t take things personally when your sales pitch is turned down, or your offer is rescinded. Re-frame it to indicate that they actually did you a great service by saving you time and effort; which is even more valuable.
3. It is often a numbers game: So, for every 10 pitches you make you will get one yes. Therefore it is never really about failure; and it is always about feedback. And the feedback you are getting is to find out who has excellent taste.
4. Go for a NO; instead of a YES: Often times we overburden and put unnecessary pressure on ourselves to be perfect in order to get a ‘YES’. This sometimes results in immobilizing ourselves from taking action. When you trick your mind into going for a ‘NO’ instead of a ‘YES'; you can take the pressure off yourself and are more willing to take action.
Remember, you cannot win, if you don’t play